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GoldOfDubaiHola mis amigos!

I don’t know if it’s the passing of the time, is it a New Year’s thing, or am I simply getting older (and wiser, naturally, amigos), but I find myself more and more pugnacious. An example, you ask? The more people try to sell me an idea, the less I actually believe in it. Plus, I tend to get extremely annoyed that somebody is so perversely determined to try to convince me. What am I getting at, amigos?

Those omnipresent advertisements that – when you stop to think – are pure truism, nothing more. “Touch of luxury”, “free bonuses”, package deals that basically include all the things you wouldn’t bring back home anyway. You know the type. That’s why I cannot react in any other way than laugh when I see the following enticement: “Account Registration For Free”. Really? Are you as kind as to let me invest my money without paying for signing up? Oh, thank you, kind sirs for allowing me the honor of entrusting my money with you without any registration fee, which is what I get 99% of the time. Honestly, it makes the program look as if there were no other advantages to advertise...

The “kind sirs” that I’m referring to are Gold of Dubai’s creators and, unfortunately, I don’t know much else about them since – despite invoking “transparent business scheme” – virtually nothing can be found about GoD’s background. Besides them trying to be the door to “ Your Personal Financial Freedom” (again, love the ad) and that “GoD is handling thousands of golden deals every day and [...] collecting even more investments for our trading activity” I can’t tell you much about Gold of Dubai.

I know, I know, silence IS golden, but I don’t think we’re supposed to take all the sayings this literally. A whois search gives us the basic time frame, that is that the domain was created on August 2, 2012 and expires within a year (and that it’s WhoIsGuard Protected). To add to this, upon registration GoD demands your full name and full address, which is nothing but ironic when you know absolutely nothing about the owners of the program, Speaking of “literally”, amigos, GoD also had this golden thought “Golden Opportunity 2013. Literally”. Should we understand it as “We will literally work only in 2013”? Because, I don’t know how to break it to you, GoD, but that’s the message you are sending with this motto. Where are all the PR specialists when you need them, I ask you.

When it comes to the program itself, it’s pretty easy to understand what Gold of Dubai is all about – the name says it all, so at least here we don’t need to launch a detailed investigation. Obviously, the program deals with gold and definitely not in a long-term, wedding band, kind of way since none of their six investment plans requires “going steady” with GoD. You can choose one of the following options: 104-120% ROI after 1 day, 120-500% after a week, 200-500% after 10 days, 500-800% after two weeks, 800-3000% after four weeks or 3000-8000% after 42 days.

Making a choice is not that hard thanks to a handy Deposit Calculator. If you can’t find the compounding option there it’s because there is none. Also, remember that principal will not get back to you. Another important issue – funding your e-wallet – also needs some forethought due to the fact that, for now, Gold of Dubai supports Liberty Reserve and Perfect Money only. It should be said, though, that according to the User Agreement, “other payment options can be reviewed by request” so make sure to contact GoD. Theoretically there are three ways to do that: using the support form, calling GoD ((+971 77 737 00 01) or via the “live support” which kind of looks like a live chat, but in fact... Is a link to the same support form that I mentioned above. Still, the support team reportedly operates 24/7, which is a nice touch.

I’ve mentioned the surprising hyperlink, but – truth be told – the whole website is a surprise. The main page, http://goldofdubai.com, isn’t actually the main page (that would be http://goldofdubai.com/index.php?a=home); the “Comodo Secure” sign does not mean much considering the fact that the page is not really secured; I can’t verify the “Block DDoS” part, because the only way it’s mentioned is in the form of the main page sticker; somebody implemented a slider in a way too literal (sic!) manner, meaning that the slides are in fact called “Slide 1. Slide 2. Slide 3”. All in all, I just can’t ignore the fact that this generic website simply looks unfinished, which would be OK if I didn’t know that the domain was purchased in August... But the pictures sure are nice, right, amigos? Almost like a postcard. It reminds me that I need some sun...

What’s considerably more surprising is that, despite its obvious shortcomings, the program seems to be quite popular: it started running on January 6 and has already attracted more than 300 users (at the moment there are over 340 active accounts) who deposited almost $10,000.00, which is rather impressing. Perhaps that’s thanks to the nowadays rare policy of paying interest every single day? According to Gold of Dubai’s company policy, “interest payments are credited every calendar day (Monday through Sunday)”, but bear in mind that due to the manual nature of the transaction GoD “[reserves] the right to hold each payout for the period of up to 8 hours before processing the withdrawal request to make sure the funds are not of fraudulent origin”. All in all, it seems that the lack of advertising skills is not something that truly affects investors’ decisions, right? Apparently, I am the only obsessed one, amigos. Well, I can live with that. Can you?

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